Please notice, semua yang ada di sini, selebay/ senorak apapun, ceritanya asli. Demiapa? Demi Allah SWT. Cerita ini udah dipendam lama, jadi maaf aja kalo frontal, dia juga gak bakal tau lah.Oke, here's the sitch. Banyak orang ngira gue udah
move on. Well here's the truth
Gue belum.Well how could? Every second in every place here reminds me of him.
And now comes
Paris, offering a different kind of love. Smooth, relaxing, enjoyable, joyfull, and yet, caring. I could go on with Paris, but what about Romeo? Well if I HAVE moved on, Romeo would've been noone and Paris'll be Romeo. Don't get it? Read carefully. Use your logic.
Romeo can't be Paris, yet Paris can never be Romeo.Romeo leaves all his signs inside of me. He carved his name there so I would never forget. I wanted to, but hell yeah I can't. So the
BIG question mark ends up at 'What Should I do". Like hell, I can't play or put off Paris. I'm not that evil kind-o-girl.
Hey you. Yeah you. Don't laugh. This is no ordinary pathetic poetic post. This is true. Just scroll down and read.> Like hell. Everyday we would meet up at (censored) and there would be no day without us getting close (until NOW). When I was close he would do unexpected things like playing with my hands (this is one of the thing he tipically did.) or whispers in my ears (hey I froze in time like those). And one evening, he was real close to my lips. Stop. We didn't do it. Only on the cheeks.
> Guitar. That fcking thing was what made us close. I was his senior in this part. That's what he said. We even made a little band named (censored). Everytime we sit and hold the guitar the first thing we would play is
Your Call - Secondhand Serenade.> This is one of the Most Special. When I got problems, he would--without thinking or compromize-- call me by the phone. This is what he would say:
Don't cry. Go to your room.
Lock the door. Now you can cry. Tell me what's wrong.
Try guitar-izing yourself, that's what I do. It's okay. I'll always be there for you.And this was one of the deepest. Most inconsolable.
I was nearly crying one night. He texted me. And these are a little PIECE of the top of the messages:
Q: Hey, why don't you go get a boyfriend?A: What for?
Q: You know, in case you got problems he would listen and take care of things.
A: Well I don't need such boys. Friends would fit well.Q: Well that's kinda right. Then I'll be your bestest friend. Just remember that I'll always be there for you.Noticed yet? Read again. Carefully.
Once again, emang keliatannya kaya dibuat2, tapi Demi Allah SWT itu asli.> One day on my friend's birthday, we went to (censored). Suddenly it rains. What then? He dragged his jacket and put on top of US. Yeah like in the movies.
(reminder: Demi Allah SWT asli). When we were ontheway home, I was sitting in the car at the backseat.
Only the two of us. Hey, we did nothing, swear. When we arrived he asked whether I want him to wait for me or not. I said no. So he left. That's that? No.
He asked me to bring his wet jacket.Pause. That's not right. Didn't felt right when he left. Well, how could it be right when he left in an unreasonable way? Why unreasonable? Because until now, still I don't know what's wrong. Neither my friend knows why. Then what happened? We were getting further and further. He replied late. Then we won't reply. Then I don't be the one who had to greet him first. No. Then we just...
d i s s a p e a r e d .Is it March already? Well it has been about almost a year we haven't talk to each other. Seriously? Never.
AT ALL (reminder: Demi Allah SWT)> That afternoon we went for school trip. That time we were a bit far. But still on the line. We didn't walk too close or talk too long. What he did when he passed by me was just pull my hands a bit or put his hands on top of my head.
Just that.When he shows how he's caring, it was unlike any other. Nope. You can't imagine. Not even me. Not even himself, I'm sure.
His
"I'll always be there" WASN'T a lie those times. It is now. It wasn't. It isn't. Hell. Can't we turn back time?
Well of course, Paris is also caring. It is a different type of care. He would grew smile with his laughter. His apology was his specialty. Why? It would bring me
down. Real down to the ground. That's why I cannot not forgive him for any reason.
Now one month ago I had this dream. This fcking dream made all Romeo memories alive. Back. Painfully. And I didn't tell anyone because I do believe things that says "Dreams won't come true if you say it"
Well, actually there's no Paris here. There's only uhm somebody. Yeah that time I was a bit in for that 'somebody'. Let's just call him
X.That day I was in this normal place. You know, (censored). And I was nearby X and just getting close to him. In this dream, Romeo was jealous. And then all of a sudden he went into the
OLD HIM (omagash I could cry like hell). Then he got back to my side, and did everything we
USED to do. And then like the
OLD times. I was his, and he's mine.
Wake up, get a life. That was just a dream. Well, let's say AMIN for that.I am NOT the type of girl who would give up. My friend suggested to greet him or text him or yeah just get together again. No. If he is a real man he would be the one who do it. Well that's impossible. He never notice my existence. Like I am obscure. Like I said, it has been nearly a year without us even talking.
Hey, back to Paris.Any suggestion? It seems hopeless to Romeo, but it is also hard to move on. I am the type who's hard to forget things. I am forgetful, like my mom said, but not at this. It's like he's been silhouetting me all the time.
Gospel truth: would like to go on with Paris. Don't want to let him know about Romeo. Nada. That would hurt him likalot.These days, I can't help but sitting in the corner. Thinking. Slowly drowned in inconsolability. Well, I'm sorry.
I think that's as far as I can go. Thanks for reading, you're really caring. Suggestion? Contact me. And please re-notice that this is true, all of em. If you don't believe then suit urself. And again, please notice that this is one of the most deepest, frontal, and sick blogpost. So I think it is kinda rare for you to read.
Wish the best of the luck
♥ Eurevannixer
